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Sunday, 5 February 2012

Writing stories and how to stop your dog killing people in your wheelchair.....

I like to write stories; well, I should say I like to start writing stories – I just never finish them.  At the moment I have about ten stories all unfinished; one is just for my daughter to read as she loves ghost stories and that one is, actually, nearly finished.

For me though the hardest part, well, aside from the whole finishing them thing, is finding names for the characters.  That’s fundamental to my even starting the story; without a good name that fits the character I have in my head (right down to their looks and clothes) I can’t start.  Sometimes it’s a real pain and I wish I could be like these other writers I read about that just slam out a book in a week, not even naming any of their characters as they go; and just trot back and conjure names, looks, etc for them all at the end.

Meanwhile back in the chaos and mayhem that is my life.......I’ve been thinking about my dog, AKA the cowardly lion.  As you know I’ve got him hitched, by his lead, to my wheelchair when I go out and he tugs me round various parks, lakes and other outdoor spaces. 

He once towed me beside the river at Dovedale in the Peak District (near(ish) where I live in the UK) ....but actually that didn’t end well when he found the slope by the stepping stones and saw ducks and children swimming and wading respectively, and felt he should join them.  Apparently he’d forgotten I was attached, and the husband only just caught me before I found myself going for a swim fully clothed; although at least it was a bright and warm summer’s day and not the nasty wet and cold kind we normally get.  Needless to say we’ve not repeated that particular towing session since.

But now I’m wondering if I should just get creative with my wheels and perhaps rig up some kind of husky sledge lead reins for it?  I mean at least then I’d have some control about where I’m actually going.

As well as ducks, he doesn’t like squirrels – the only two beings in all of creation that he doesn’t appear to be scared of (perhaps because they generally just run away from him before he runs from them?)  So naturally I’m terrified that one day he’ll take it into his head to try and follow a squirrel into a tree....and up I go.

Sure he won’t make it - but that dog is stubborn; how far will he get before he admits defeat, and how broken am I going to get in the meantime?  So reins seem like a good idea.  I mean he responds to ‘mush, mush’ like the huskies do; I just need a command to get him to stop now.  Oh and just saying (or yelling desperately in my case) “stop” doesn’t work, before you ask.

Stopping is good, obviously; it’s just that he doesn’t unless someone makes him.  More than once my husband and daughter have had to take off after me as they’ve let go of the wheelchair to see “how fast the dog can really go” without them holding him back, only to find me suddenly disappearing into the distance.

Actually maybe a brake would be better....a big one; huge in fact - even a horn or bell too?  It’ll be so much nicer than me screaming “for God’s sake get out of the way before we kill you!” as we approach people at (what feels like to me) 90 miles an hour.
Strangely the husband and daughter are currently against me doing all this as they say me and the dog are dangerous enough as it is.  Still we’ll see – they’re not here all day, and my hands still work........

This is Simi; thanks for reading.

1 comment:

  1. Oh my GOD! That was SO funny, I nearly wet my panties! lol.
    You are SUCH a good descriptive writer. I could actually SEE this as it happened.
    Y A